A couple of years ago I went internet hopping and I came across a site that gives you access to your partner’s conversation. Basically, if you put in your partner’s phone number, you will be able to listen in to his/her conversation. That website also had other ‘cool’ tools and services. I was tempted. In fact let me be quite honest, I was VERY
tempted. But, as I sat down looking at my computer screen, I realized that by participating in this website, I am basically infringing on someone’s privacy and I couldn’t just go through with that (as most of you know, I am a privacy freak!).
I remember calling a good male friend of mine to whom I make a couple of my confessions to and telling him of my most recent need to become a private investigator/sleuthing professional/ technical partner checker with technological tools (any of these terms will do!). His comment was, “why is it that when African women get into relationships, they become almost schizophrenic?”. I laughed at his comment but it got me thinking as I went on to check on the stats of this sleuthing website. From what I could see, this site was doing quite well, so there are lots of people checking up on their partners who do not care about the whole privacy concept. It got me thinking, “where is the trust???”.
Trust is a five letter word, which according to the Webster and other dictionary’s out there, means complete confidence in a person’s integrity. It leaves me with the question, “how many of us trust completely in our partner’s integrity?” How many of us, have found ways of getting into our partners email boxes, face book pages, phone systems and what other systems out there to find out who he/she is talking to, or who he is spending his online and off line moments with other than you?
I have often wondered if the trust issue is more of Freudian slip than anything else. Are you ultimately telling your partner when you are doing these things that you do not trust YOURSELF? Are you really looking for an out from the relationship?I really do not know. I personally do not think it is possible to trust your partner 100 % these days. But, I do know this – Trust is a five letter word,that often comes with commitment, loyalty and integrity. Do you trust your partner completely?